I’m sorry for writing to you again it’s like I know I shouldn’t but the self control kind of goes out the window when it’s 12:30 in the morning.
So I am in New York at the moment. And honestly it is amazing. I was feeling really stuck back in the bay area, and going back to where I grew up really might’ve been the worst decision I have made so far because there I forget that there’s so much that I still haven’t seen or been through. I’m not so terrified anymore about the gray area beyond my next half-year when I graduate because after being in the big city I realize it’s kind of awesome figuring things out along the way.
I flew here by myself but so far I’ve visited my uncle and aunt in New Jersey that I haven’t seen in 10 years! Family is a funny thing, because honestly these people are like strangers to me but from the moment I saw them it was like I cared about them so much already and it didn’t matter that we rarely ever talked. The east coast as I’m sure you know is really, really cool. Colonial looking houses and just a different feeling entirely! And I saw post-hurricane wreckage and an abandoned boardwalk and it is definitely an eye-opener.
I arrived in Manhattan yesterday…and am staying for the rest of the week. I think I’ve fallen in love with Central Park, and even though it’s still technically winter here it’s probably one of the most beautiful places I’ve been! I have a lot of places I want to see everyday but I am making sure to walk through the park at least once a day. Tomorrow I’m teaching myself how to use the subway and taking it to see an old friend in Brooklyn, and honestly I’m scared but at the same time I just don’t want to be so afraid anymore. So I’m going to go into this with fists in the air and see what happens. It’s probably really dumb that I can get so much out of taking a little subway by myself but even though it’s only been a couple days into my trip I already feel like myself again. I forgot I could be fun if I wanted, and that I didn’t have to feel so tired all the time. I forgot how much I loved museums and learning about stuff besides psychology, I forgot that there was a life besides school.
This trip even just a few days in has meant more to me than I had even planned for. I just hope I can keep this up even when I return back.
Sent from my iPhone